Week 21: New Year's Resolutions

 


1/ To aspire towards even higher decibal levels. Currently, my dad describes my babbling as akin to a nuclear warning alarm, but I feel my vocal chords have got more to give. With my lungs still developing, I know I can throw this voice further. I want to be so loud that an alien on Pluto turns to another one and says, "Did you hear that?"

2/ I started rolling a few months ago and then decided to stop. Most of the time my mum, dad and brother just bring things to me, so I don't see the point in moving too much. However, when mum is watching Strictly, dad is reading The Radio Times and Kit is spinning around; then I think it would be quite helpful if I could roll to get my toy.

3/ I've enjoyed the drum kit my Grandma and Grandpa got me for Christmas. To put it bluntly I'm a natural. I saw a guy called Keith Moon on the television the other day, who my daddy said was the most explosive drummer of his day. In all honesty, the buffoon doesn't know a sunhat from a hi-hat, a snare drum from a fruit plum, a bass drum from a sucked thumb. Give me the year and I'll be something special.

4/ Smile less. I smile all of the time, I just can't help myself. The trouble with me being so giving with my smiles is I'm doing my family no favours. If you set a low bar, then you're going to attract minimal effort. If you set the bar high then people are going to have to work hard to clear it. By using my chops less I'll push their comic chops harder. It is by being tough with them that they'll raise their game. Mankind innovates in the face of adversity. I therefore look forward to seeing their comedy progress.

5/ I going to try some of that food. What I say isn't to diminish my mum's efforts: she is in every sense the milk of human kindness. But I would like to introduce a bit of variety into my diet. I see their food and it's different colours; I smell their food and it's different aromas and I can tell by the empty bowls they've enjoyed the taste of it. How do I get my hands on it though? Do I make it myself? When my brothers not spinning around, I'll ask him. Despite his fondness for making himself dizzy, there is a brain there - he'll know what to do.

6/ To learn new things. I want to sew jumpers like mummy and read those big books with no pictures like daddy. It will be challenging, but if I work hard I'll be done by October.

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